An Elegy Written to Slumdog Millionaire on the Eve of the Indian Republic Day
Monday, 26. January 2009 - 5:51 PM
I wrote this to sum up what Slumdog Millionaire is all about. For your reading pleasure.
Boyle oh Boyle I see thy vain toil
About the plight of the Indian soil
Spent burning several midnights’ oil
Hath yielded rich fruit after much appreciative roil,
Boyle oh Boyle!
Oh but what a grand masterpiece you’ve emitted taking after
The pristine mould of the seminal gutter inspector
Who sought and found only what she saw in her mind’s sewer–
Only the integrated stink of the India she held so dear,
But you are but her latter-year borrower,
O you poorly-gifted creator of Slumdog Millionaire!
Boyle oh Boyle!
What puzzling plot, what brutal Bombay,
What Hindu-Muslim hanky-panky,
What elevated cinematic savagely, what display of art spunky,
Whose depth can fathom only a heroin junkie;
Boyle oh Boyle!
Oh to metamorphose phantasms as reality, to buy praise–
Reclusive Rahman is inside a gold-covered haze,
And Guileless Gulzar in similar daze–
Penpushers have blazed their ayes,
Their loyal sepoys inside India’s gates, blessed with this latest braise
On their soles ever for the next dole of the dollar, happy to set their land ablaze,
O what seas have you swum in the slum, traversed what ways–
Boyle oh Boyle!
Tags: Anti-India Slumdog Millionaire, Danny Boyle, India is still Colonized, Indian Politics, Original Poetry, Slumdog Milionaire, Society & Culture, Sucking up to the West, Tarnishing India
26. January 2009 - 9:13 PM
Rahman has given us many melodious patriotic numbers and a “Vande Mataram”. You still don’t like him Sandeep?
26. January 2009 - 9:33 PM
i think the slumdog millionaire should be viewed in context of a media presentation like any other bollywood blockbuster.It tells the story in no otherway but in bollywood style albeit with more graphic presentation of the sheer enormity of the “other” India. As an indian, as embarrassing as it is, poverty is a reality perpetuated by politicians and ignored by intelligensia. Rather than complaining about it resolve should to tackle it in what ever way it is possible. POVERTY AND SHEER SCALE OF IT IS NO DOUBT UNDERBELLY OF MODERN INDIA. FOR HER TO BE ON TOP SHE HAS TO BE ACCEPT IT UNDERSTAND IT AND EGT RID OF IT. We canot afford to bury our head in sand and complain of being biased foriegners who are ehere to exloit povert. That surely would be end of dream that we all have for India.
28. January 2009 - 1:31 AM
This smells of typical celbrity-do-good elitism again. Stereotypes and phony compassion is unfortunately everything hollywood (and now Bollywood) ever are able to talk about. I think Bollywood will approximate Hollywood in the future and the PC-culture and the condescending cultural nihilism is bound to choke India as well as it has strangled the Western world.
You have been warned..
28. January 2009 - 11:54 AM
Slumdog Millionaire: The Prejudice Continues by Saurav Basu.
28. January 2009 - 5:36 PM
Who are the real slumdog millionaires?
The crafty businessmen who made this flick, and are minting money from it. “Rags to riches” has an altogether new meaning now!
3. August 2009 - 12:50 PM
why the big hue and cry when our povery and unhygenic living conditions are exposed to the outside world? First accept the fact that IT exists and then move ahead. Lets stop pretending that all is well with us and that india is shining in glory as in all bollywood flicks. one should realise that selectively portraying the elite and their lifestyles in popular films cannot alter ground realities.
4. August 2009 - 11:41 AM
My dream some days back.
It is 1938. In remote village in Bhelpur, the village mukhiya is angry and he gives a speech that we have to find out who translated the Mythili libaaz of inheritance in a twisted manner to Lord Boyle and Lord Simon in English. Yes , after three days, they find a new Indian Civil Service (ICS) recruit who was posted in Kenya earlier had translated all this in a twisted manner. The Mukhiya was furious to learn that Vikram Roop, the ICS had done this twisted translation. The villagers with the Mukhiya plan their action. They go to the learned Daulatram to show this and what action could be taken. The twisted translation had made them loose most of their land and they had become paupers. Slowly they plan. Daulatram comes with a smelly obnoxious idea. Why not make Lord Boyle, Lord Simon and Vikram Roop wear only a langot and dip them in a pit full of excreta. ” Excreta !!! Excreta !!! shouts the Mukhiya to Daulatram. Daulatram responds ” Sirf unko excreta yanike goo me doobana hai aur phir upar keechna hai. Unko maloom hona chaiye ke hamara goo karne ki jagah aur udhar ka samne wale sara zameen ko lekar, hamahe kitna parashani pahuchayi”.
The villagers of Bhelpur unite and when all unite there is success. The day of the dip arrives. The entire village watches the three wearing a langot and being dipped in pit of excreta. The Mukhiya is jubilant at this. He keeps on shouting ” Excreta!!! Excreta!!! and the villagers shout in chorus in their own way. The chorus resounds ” Excreta!! Excreta!!! as the three are lifted up and dipped back into the pit of excreta for number of times.
I also shout ” Excreta !!! Excreta!! and with joy fall off my bed in my sleep. The cleaner who was cleaning my hotel room, (it was early morning) was a bit confused. First he smiled and then he asked me ” Are you doing some excreta analysis” I said “No” getting up from the floor. The cleaner said ” It is all shit now , no more excreta” He inquired whether I was hurt. Fortunately the joy of the dream , made me only scream , as I feel on my fleshy portion.
I did not talk to him much, but inquired with him as to whether he was doing a part time cleaning job. Yes he said , I studied upto intermediate in college and then hard times came , I had to do a correspondence course with this cleaning job to support.
I knew in 1938 , shit had not arrived. I brushed my teeth and had coffee and then looked at the mirror and said to myself ” You have a script now , just expand it”
It is some days now after the dream, but just see how in the subconscious , I am still unhappy. I leave it to some good script writer to expand on this and write a full fledged story. Go ahead readers, the sky is the limit if you are not bothered about the credit.
This was earlier written in a web site. Repeating it here.