Slimes Productions proudly presents! Phir Mile Sur Mera Tumhara. This 16-minute digital affront from the Slimes of India group singlehandedly eclipses the candle-lit darkness of the eminent dolts who were awarded various Lotus Awards for Family Loyalty on Republic Day. The Slimes of India is on an urgent mission to show ‘em who’s the worst. And so it descended upon the original Mile Sur Mera Tumhara and sodomized it so thoroughly that this version resembles an ugly tableau of cropped, trimmed, permed, sprayed, waxed-and-dyed Page 3 celebrity dumbos. See, the Slimes’ feat? Henceforth even in casual conversation, we’ll need to clarify: “the original” and the gutter version. This feat is comparable to the Slimes introducing one of its pioneering lows: introducing soft porn in mainstream media.
I hope the Slimes won’t muster the audacity to claim that this is “their interpretation” of the original to “reflect the contemporary reality of the diversity that is India.” But with God and Slimes, nothing is predictable. The most unpardonable element in the latest sin from the Slimes’ mammoth factory of perversion is that it robs the dignity of the original Mile Sur Mera Tumhara. The original wasn’t a masterpiece by any standard but it had a kind of a simplistic finesse. But what really made it appealing was, so to say, the cast of characters. Bhimsen Joshi, Balamuralikrishna, Lata Mangeshkar, and Kamal Hassan, all accomplished people in their own fields and each deserving the adulation he/she was bestowed upon by the public. And most importantly, the celebrity noise quotient was extremely low–the video maintained a highly optimal balance between showing “ordinary people” and celebrities.
Cut to 22 years later. The Slimes’ mortal rape turns the original on its head and whips it brutally for 16 painful minutes. It oozes celebrity trash from every pore. No prizes for guessing that a majority of these celebrities have a nudge-nudge wink-wink relationship with the Slimes group. They are featured regularly on the various polluting units of the Slimes–SOI (the “main newspaper”), Page 3 of the SOI, Slimes Music and DVDs, Doom TV, and its various “Mirrors.” Again, no prizes for guessing that barring verrry few exceptions (Rashid Khan, and Zakir Hussain, why did you agree to be part of this vulgarity? why? why? why?), the whole celebrity brigade is simply a Slimes-like media creation.
The tour de disgrace begins with that sound engineer par excellence, A.R. Rahman showing off his skills with the Fingerboard (with the brandname, Continuum. Yeah, it’s the Slimes corporate suckage after all). I don’t begrudge Rahman’s skills but here’s the thing: we have far too many musical instruments today and almost zero melody and music. Besides, it’s not an original achievement to take an existing tune and play it on a different instrument. And then the celebrities begin to rain upon us torrentially: Amitabh Bachchan (not really the overtly Page 3 type but still) now promoted to early entry compared to the original where he appears in the end, Shankar Mahadevan yelling his lungs off, Anoushka Shankar trying to look pretty, Tamil actor Vikram punching you in the face, a domesticated Aishwarya auntie elegantly in tow with hubby at the Ellora caves, Telugu star Mahesh Babu badly lip-syncing, Pt Shiv Kumar Sharma in the company of some metrosexualish young chaps, Gurdas Mann yelling again, Zakir Hussain (why?), Bhupen Hazarika (kind sir, please stop singing), Shilpa Shetty strutting with a sexy gait…and then without warning, a half-banian-wearing Salman Khan lets himself loose upon us. You MUST watch him swaying retardedly with a galaxy of confused kids. And then Rashid Khan (why?). This is followed by the Page 3 drummer Sivamani who emerges as though from some dark, liquid depths like a monster threatening to smash everything it sees. For God’s sake, this guy uses his sticks to first thulp water as a precursor to render you deaf with what follows. Post-Sivamani, we’re treated to a heartwarming family photograph-cum-musical show. I can almost read: “Slimes Productions proudly invites you to witness a grand musical performance from a talented family.” We’re talking about L.Subramaniam and Family. The lyrics in Kannada are mildly put, dreadful. But even worse is Kavita Krishnamurthy Subramaniam: she bores a crater-sized hole in your ear with her shrillness all the while butchering the language with her unspeakable pronunciation. But what’s more interesting is the fact that the Slimes group chose L. Subramaniam as representing Karnataka. L. Subramaniam has spent most of his career living outside the state, and he rarely if ever participates in, or has left any record of service to the language or culture of Karnataka. But he’s Page 3 “family” material. L. Subramaniam is followed by the lissome Deepika Padukone standing just a few feet away from a waterfall, resembling Mandakini’s cousin removed in time. She lip-syncs on the theme of National Integration but the camera ensures that it focuses first on her smooth, bare legs. Oh well, I guess the Item Number is also part of National Integration. And then Priyanaka “Fashion” Chopra pitches in for added but uneventful impact. After a couple of no-shows, Amjad Ali Khan benevolently handles his sarod before we’re treated to the scene of his young sons: YAFA=Yet Another Family Affair. In Amjad Ali Khan’s case, mediocrity has (thankfully) bred two mediocrities. From the regal surroundings of Delhi & Rajasthan, the camera takes us way down to the extreme South. From the land of coconuts and communists, emerge Yesudas (why?) and Mammooty. Nothing eventful. And then, a few no-shows later, the Slimes launches a sniper-assault of what must rank as the vilest form of bastardization ever conceived: Shobana (so talented but why?) and Shiamak Davar doing a twosome (it’s not what you think, you filthy minds!)–she doing some graceful Bharatnatyam moves and he, well, what was his “dance form” called again? We wonder what a guy like Shiamak Davar is doing in a National Integration song? We have absolutely no record of Davar contributing anything to India’s culture–moves that resemble acrobatics and military drill don’t count as dance. To his eternal discredit, he has churned out hundreds of mindless batches of dancing soldiers who are neither dancers nor soliders. And this guy can’t even speak a single Indian language. Putting him side by side with Shobana is..well… never mind. This noxious dance-mix is followed by Aamir Khan’s grand entry in the company of lots of endearing tiny tots. What’s with this Khan duo and their penchant for being seen with kids? Social service and kindness and sensitivity I suppose until I’m proven wrong. But Aamir really steals the facade whole show. He sings Mile sur mera tumhara in the same vein as “Aye! kya bolti tu…aati kya Khandala?” Admittedly, the singer is different here but it doesn’t dilute the mind-numbing impact. And then a grotesquely-made up Sonu Nigam (or is it Niigaam or Nigaam or Niigam?) croons at a shrill pitch with some indecipherable sound (Aaa oouuu eeaaa hoooyeaa waaa aaaa). Really, Sonu, what’s wrong with you? I do hold him in some regard as a fairly decent singer but sigh…I guess even the toughest can’t resist the green lure of the Slimes. Shahid Kapoor is next. Shahid. Please. STOP! Luckily, Ranbir Kapoor who follows him for a brief flash almost sleeps through the mini-second he’s given. And, to preserve the best for the last, the Slimes’ biggest and most successful creation till date Shahrukh Khan, emerges in the background of the Bandra-Worli sealink and treats us to some scary, Darr-like facial contortions and bodily paroxysms. And just like there’s no Rama without Sita, Karan Johar with his charming tilt of head and suave smile, follows Shahrukh Khan. When he rests on a railing in some mall-like building, you can almost picture him talking to high-society Bollywood/celebrity aunties: “Oh really! Ma’am, that must’ve been the mooost romantic thing he’s ever done for you!” Finally, this celebrity lineup is followed as an afterthought, by micro-second glimpses of sportspersons, the Tricolour, and our Armed Forces before culminating in some barely-audible bits of the national anthem.
Thus ends the disgusting cacophonic melange of celebrity parade masquerading as something really noble. With this, the Slimes has managed to herald the onset of dumbing down Republic Day. We shudder to think what it’ll come up with on Jan 26, 2011, or even Aug 15, 2010. But on the good side, the video is getting some solid, royal asskicking it deserves.
I don’t normally mention personal stuff here but I distinctly recall the emotional distance I’ve travelled vis a vis the Republic and Independence days. In school and college, this, and August 15 used to be days that thrilled me for deeper reasons than the mere story of our freedom struggle. I’ll just say it sort of reinforced my conviction that there’s something worthy about this country, worthy enough to sacrifice everything. But then, children–the generation beginning in the mid-1980s–continue to be taught that India is a worthless country and there’s nothing really special about these two days except boring speeches at school and well, you get a holiday for the rest of the day. This generation finds it fashionable to talk about “weird Hindu religious practices.” It’s unfair to blame them because they had teachers who themselves didn’t believe in the value of these two days and/or didn’t inculcate them in their students for whatever reason. And then we have the intellectual-liberal-secular gang that brands patriotism as a term of abuse, as the last resort of a scoundrel, and the armed forces as symbols of tyranny. All of these–patriotism, a strong Defence, and signal days in a nation’s milieu are interconnected in ways deeper and more meaningful than we realize. Over time, our worthies have managed to destroy everything that these two days stood for. The only values our children now have are the fashion industry, Bollywood and the opportunism and everything that goes with it.
Phir Mile Sur Mera Tumhara is a singular and obscene illustration of this destruction.
Tags: Celebrity Trash, Commentary, Dissection of Phir mile sur mera tumhara, Independence Day, India, Mile sur mera tumhara, Patriotism, Phir mile sur mera tumhara, Pseudosecularism, Republic Day, Secularism, Slimes Group, Slimes of India, Society & Culture, SOI, Times Group, Times of India
Awesome Sandeep…[:)] Kudos for ripping the facade in the name of patriotism put up by the old whore of Boribunder.
I wish I could summon the vitriol words to write such a peice. I cannot imgine adarker moment in the great civilization that is ours. Through the coleective effort of the media (? and us the people) we have created the most impossible synonymns for patriotism and culture; Cricket and Bollywood.And what a great suceess this has been!
Indians being victimised in oz.Well the victimized Indians came up with a perfect solution Friendly cricket with the aussies and bollywood dance on australia day.
I genuinely used to love movies and cricket but at this stage either of these words gives a bleeding ulcer
Ravi
[...] National Integration: Slimes Style [...]
Sandeep Dear,
Just how much I more agree with you!
“This 16-minute digital affront”. Absolutely correct.
“And so it descended upon the original Mile Sur Mera Tumhara and sodomized it so thoroughly that this version resembles an ugly tableau of cropped, trimmed, permed, sprayed, waxed-and-dyed Page 3 celebrity dumbos.”
I said yesternight ‘It is bastardized version of the original one.
Excellently u said it what I always wanted to say and that is about AR Rahman, “…sound engineer par excellence, A.R. Rahman…”. Kudos.
PI.
Awesome
It is going to be the first time I disagree with you Sandeep. And heartily so.
Salman Khan was not [You MUST watch him] swaying retardedly with a galaxy of confused kids He is singing in Sign Language with a group of children who can’t speak or hear. It is true there is a surfeit of movie stars and celebrities. But being an NRI who chose to leave, nay logged out of, India in mid-career, I have a lot of respect for those who see the world but return to their homeland – including you. OK so you don’t like L. Subramaniam – but he is in the video in place of his late brother Vaidyanathan who composed the original with Louis Banks. Every form of music, dance and art finds its home in India. So I take exception to your dissing of Sivamani my fellow Madrasi who learned his beats listening to the funeral drummers of N. Madras on their march to the Krishnampet cemetery, and then braved his father’s merciless beatings to learn to play the drums (because his father did not want the son following him in the thankless world of sessions musicians) My kids grew up on Aamir Khan’s “Kya bolti…” and loved to watch the video.
Sandeep,
Thanks!! You saved me from a disgraceful experience before a completely unrelated youtube search in another tab landed me to a result directly pointing to the video.
Ravi, you said -
“Indians being victimised in oz.Well the victimized Indians came up with a perfect solution Friendly cricket with the aussies and bollywood dance on australia day.
I genuinely used to love movies and cricket but at this stage either of these words gives a bleeding ulcer”
Indians need to know that the Main Stream Media of both India and Australia is hiding the fact that most attacks on Indians have been made by Lebanese muslims. I know that their are racists in Australia, but there is no need to brand an entire country as racist, and you must read up on this. Google “Australian beach riots” without the quotes.
anoushka is looking pretty!! Come on, be generous.
On a more serious note, the whole video perhaps sums up Indian media (tv / newspapers / magazines) today: rubbishy, mediocre, celebrity-obsessed & sadly, completely out of sync with (sanatan) culture of this ancient land.
And u really do write very well.
Awesome sir..
http://krishashok.wordpress.com/2010/01/26/mile-sur-mera-tomorrow-fail/
Feels great reading this post.
Its like downing a bottle of Eno Fruit Salt after a sickening meal of puries fried in engine oil.
Sandeep,
Completely agree with your analysis.
“Bhupen Hazarika (kind sir, please stop singing)” couldn’t stop laughing for mins after this…
They could have easily done it without Rashid Khan, Zakir and Yesudas. May be Sukhwinder, Raghu Dixit(or is it Dikshit) and Gurukiran as replacements…
“Raghu Dixit(or is it Dikshit)” – from a comment above. The spelling “Dikshit” is used by Sheila Dikshit who pioneered it and who I suspect is a christian. I do not have any proof and I will thank anyone who can tell me who actually Sheila Dipshit is.
Not sure if Dikshit is Christian but for sure her son-in-law is a conservative muslim – her daughter converted to marry (don’t they all)
That drives a lot of her bangldeshi illegal friendly policies.
Add to it the immediate influence of Maino helps Christian sentiments
“”"The only values our children now have are the fashion industry, Bollywood and the opportunism and everything that goes with it.”"”
So true and so sad..
Great post ! Thanks for writing!
“Over time, our worthies have managed to destroy everything that these two days stood for. The only values our children now have are the fashion industry, Bollywood and the opportunism and everything that goes with it.”
yes, this is exactly why UPA is ruling this nation.
Sandeep,
Absolutely awesome piece of writing.
Reading it made my day. As you rightly say, this abomination of a video thoroughly deserves the flak it is getting.
Thanks a lot sandeep for penning down the reaction of most of us in your ever impeccable style.
-Raghavan
>>>“children–the generation beginning in the mid-1980s–continue to be taught that India is a worthless country and there’s nothing really special about these two days except boring speeches at school and well, you get a holiday for the rest of the day. This generation finds it fashionable to talk about “weird Hindu religious practices.” It’s unfair to blame them because they had teachers who themselves didn’t believe in the value of these two days and/or didn’t inculcate them in their students for whatever reason. And then we have the intellectual-liberal-secular gang that brands patriotism as a term of abuse, as the last resort of a scoundrel, and the armed forces as symbols of tyranny. All of these–patriotism, a strong Defence, and signal days in a nation’s milieu are interconnected in ways deeper and more meaningful than we realize. Over time, our worthies have managed to destroy everything that these two days stood for. The only values our children now have are the fashion industry, Bollywood and the opportunism and everything that goes with it.”
The generation beginning in the mid-1980s grew up exchanging mera-bharat-mahan-DD for west-is-mahan-MTV.
Probably due to this reason, that generation “ finds it fashionable to talk about “weird Hindu religious practices.” and value the fashion industry, Bollywood and the opportunism and everything that goes with it.
The post liberalization generation(beginning mid-1990s) grew up in a shining India, one that was getting recognition the world over as a source for comparatively cheap software programming, english speaking, labour for western empires.
That shining India and whatever little pride it generated, paved way for a re-look at India’s past heritage.
The freedom of information provided by internet is fuelling emergence of consciousness among people that India was not always a slave market for western empires as propagated by the marxist academicians, that it had a far greater heritage, as a pioneer in spiritual, intellectual and material advancement in consonance with Nature and supporting moral values. The dissemination of works by Shri Ram Swarup, Sita Ram Goel etc., and articles by Rajiv Malhotra, Sankrant Sanu and others helped shape this emerging consciousness.
The emerging generation (beginning mid-2000s) are being exposed to this consciousness also, even as the efforts to subvert the discourse continues vigorously by the interested parties, the hand maidens of western empire,- greedy capitalists, marxists, missionaries and mullahs.
The hijacking of ideas of national integration by the Slimes and the rant against bloggers by Singhvi are part of ongoing efforts at subversion.
The clash of civilizations is actually emerging. It is the clash between the civilizations that were indigenous to all lands arrayed alongside mother Nature against the totally uncivilizing western culture that attempted to decimate all those civilizations and mother Nature, during the past two millenniums.
The centuries of vanavas and agyatavas are over. The pancha pandavas, the indigenous cultures of Asia, Africa, Americas, Australia and Europe are seeking just retribution. The UN and other world bodies are erring like the pitamaha.
Earth is the kurukshetra in this mahabharata war.
Get Sri Krishna as your guide in this war. Get realization, brahma jnana.
Sandeep:
Excellent post.
Have read quite a few reviews of “PMSMT” and all of them without an exception, have criticised it.
Sandeep ,
how could you miss this point.. the most sick thing of all … the way slimes groups miked 26/11 … showing Taj hotel and some more taj and little more with little bit of chataarapati shivaji terminus trown in .. may be they should have added oberoi hotel and cama hospital and kasab and friends mumbai sightseeing trip would have been complete
cheers
sandeep
Now you have really exposed the media and the game it plays. But thankfully, i dont see the entire population getting infected with such fatuation of media. Yes, it is true that present generation hates everything which is related to hindu and sanatani culture, but that population is not as it seems. Media only shows it to glorify themselves that they are making a huge role in the social change of india. Rest apart, people still believe in the sanatani way of life and not the life preached by baniyan showing KATUA CALLED SALMAN KHAN.
Superb Sandeep